Mood:
crushed out"i kant help to think that we are jus frendz...i meant wut i sed last nite..no regrets...as much as i didnt wanna show it..i wuz crushed last nite to hear that u still be doin wutchu been doing frum tha start..which makes me not want u at all no more..the arguments before this may have been ridiculous..but now i knoe that i must get over you in order to move on with my life and realize that i need a man more than jus a boy who still dosent know what he wants..seriously.. .im tired of trying to make it better between yooh n meh..im tired of going thru thoughts only knowing that you check out other girls because of their body.. i know that mine aint perfect..but i know guys who are willing to be with me ..n love my body..they dont even dare to look at other girls because they must knoe how it feels for a girl to be looking at guys because of their bodies..so i think they realize that at least..yes..everywun makes mistakes..everywun may be human..but that aint a excuse..im going to be real with you ..im ready to finally let go of you..im ready to find me a man that will love me for me..and no one else..i may not even think about my future with another guy..but im ready to find a different future..one that will not contradict with my life. For you to think of a future with me n yooh having a kid together..in order to get there u haftah get the heart of the girl..n rite now..my hearts running away..to hear such hurtful but truthful things is only leading me away..n i knoe your only being real with me..but now i knoe who u really are..n im glad ur revealling it to me cuz now i knoe..i dont need it..i dont want it..as much as my heart really wants you..your not the one for me..ppo may think its ridiculous that i would leave you or try to not want you because you check out other girls..unfortunately those ppo who think like that ..their gfz..they dont knoe how they feel n thats sad..cuz i knoe for a fact..no girl likes to be not looked at becuz of her body..jus basically the fact that their own guy that they love n given their all to checks out other gerlz despite their physical appearances.. das foah break da heart alreadee..u mine as well jus tell a gerl..u got an unattracting body..n i feel sorry for those girls that are going thru that with their guys..vice versa wit the guy..cuz i dont think no guy likes wen their gerlz check out other guys cuz of da otha guys body..it kills tha ego..n u kant lie bout dat...butterflyz are gone..foolish meh..
n i really hate to see it..but if i end up wit sole agen..u cant blame him for being him...he may still be a kid in sum places..but remember so are yooh..n yours is the most hurtful yet..with him ..i knoe i can make him change to a man..its easier becuz till this day he's waiting for me..n loves me for me..everything about me..everything..n i knoe he will be able to change becuz he'll do anything for me..but yooh..its close to impossible becuz u dont even knoe your full self..at least kamu knows what he wants..and thats me..body n all..i feel loved with him..wanted..but sadly with yooh..i feel like ur jus with me for half the package..mai personality..n u kant leave jus becuz we've been together so long n stuff..
only wen u find love...will i ever come bak to you..but im jus letting you knoe that im really ready to move on..maybe try n help another boy turn into a man...ive been thru mostly every hurtful thing that can hurt a gerl..from physical to mental..the body n heart cant live without the mind..kill the mind..u kill everything..im alreadee dead...but im still going to keep my head up..n keep moving..moping around aint gona help no one..
your definitely not ready to settle down..n im looking for that..n i will letchu knoe that i will find..too bad tho..cuz i really wanted it with yooh..but wuts love wen two kant giv each other their everything..i gave you my everything..but i feel ur not..that includes ur eyes..it means a lot to a girl jus to let you knoe..
jus a piece of advice..if u end up with another chick..make sure u dont hurt her..be real with her..let her know wut your all about..before even touching her..cuz with jus a touch..u can make anywun go under that spell ..i think thats what i was under..but now..i wont let your spell hold me bak..im gona become real n find sumwun whos gona be real wit me..show the same reciprocity...now thats what i call love..."
